5 THINGS WE LEARNED FROM . . .
By Patrick Kampert
Published October 1, 2006
The Father Factor
By Stephan B. Poulter (Prometheus, $18 paper)
Whether your father was terrific or a tyrant, affirming or absent, he psychologically has marked you for life, and that includes the way you operate in the workplace. In a thought-provoking work, psychologist Poulter looks at five fathering styles: Superachiever, Time Bomb, Passive, Absent and Compassionate Mentor. His tips help you identify the traits your father's style has produced in you, overcome the scars and even benefit from your past.
- Shame and self-doubt are two lingering side effects of poor fathering.
- A passive dad: "My father always came home from work and went directly to the living room couch. He spent the entire evening there, reading the newspaper and watching TV."
- Even if your father did a poor job, it doesn't doom you to a stunted adulthood.
- "Always remember the old Chinese proverb that says that, if you are going to resent someone, you'd better dig two graves--one for the person you resent and the other one for you."
- Being a compassionate mentor at work can have a huge impact not just on you but also on those around you.